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I dig conspiracy theories, mainly because they might be true even though they aren't. Unlike UFOs / aliens, which have been proven to not exist.
Bob Marleys toe, McCartney imposter, Courtney killed Kurt, the Queen killed Princess Di, 9/11 was a CGI stunt, No-one ever got past van halens belt (not even Dweezil)...
So, any new changes with the JFK thing 50 years on?
TT

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and I know, I think

Ok, I'll play. While I do not believe that there is any definite proof that we have ever been visited by aliens, I have no idea how you can make the claim that "UFOs / aliens, which have been proven to not exist." How is it possible to prove anything does not exist? Since our universe is incredibly vast, I do not think any human has the ability to prove there is no life anywhere else in the universe. For instance, I challenge anyone to prove that there are not toasters living out a rather happy existence on a planet 1 million light years away from here.

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“The power of pop music to corrupt and putrify the minds of world youth are virtually limitless."

I collected Zappa Forum Conspiracies for a while. Current belief is Disco Boy = Isaac, basically since both users have in common that they accuse their opponent of exactly what they have been doing then refuse to admit that they have been doing it. Not sure at what number I'd be now.

Hey: Search function! Be right back!
EDIT:
Most of these hail from the time one character (Zombie + some number) got banned and frequently re-signed up to be an asshole. My ignore list has a couple of them.

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Join the PackardGoose forum! Send me a PM!

If you truly believe that, then you must be dyslexic...

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"...I'm absolutely a Libertarian on MANY issues..." ~ Frank Zappa, Rochester, NY, March 11, 1988

Just foolin'.
TT

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and I know, I think

My favourite theory of this kind concerns the conspiracy by historians to blacken the Emperor Caligula's name.

Caligula - many have heard of the apparently mad Emperor from the "I, Claudius" book and the film with Malcolm McDowell

The story goes he...
a) Declared himself a God!
b) Married his sister!
c) Built a pontoon bridge across the bay of Baiae so that he could ride across it in order to fulfill a prophecy!
d) Attacked the sea and ordered his soldiers to collect shells as "booty from Neptune"!

However, I read an interesting article in the Journal of Ancient History some time ago, that attempted to explain these stories and it almost had me convinced that maybe Caligula wasn't mad after all.

a) By declaring himself a God, Caligula was attempting to establish legitimacy for his rule. Augustus had already posthumously been made a God as was Julius Caesar. Tiberius had generally eschewed any honours at all and thus the legitimacy of his constitutional position was constantly being put in doubt by the senate. A declaration of divinity made Caligula an absolute monarch and effectively "easternized" the principate giving the Princeps a position that can be compared to the Pharaohs in Egypt, who were also worshipped as Gods in their lifetimes.

b) There is no actual evidence that he married his sister. If he had sexual relations with her it would ,once again, find a parallel in Ancient Egypt where the Pharaohs were expected to marry their siblings.

c) The building of the pontoon bridge coincided with a rare visit to Italy by a Parthian embassy. This considerable engineering feat was designed to impress the foreigners with Roman technical knowhow and naval prowess.

d) Caligula planned an invasion of Britain from Gaul, but because of financial problems had to call it off. The soldiers were ordered to gather up shells. Now shell in Latin is "muscula" and it can refer to sea shells (mussels). It can also refer to tents. Thus it is highly likely that the order went out to strike camp and gather up the tents.

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"I have learned from my mistakes, and I am sure I can repeat them exactly."

There are no conspiracy theories, only conspiracies:

HUMAN RESOURCES Social Engineering In The 20th Century HQ FULL
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4rnJEdDNDsI

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I remember some FZ Interview where he admits to have a fond of conspiration theories. He said that he didn't believe AIDS being a natural disease in this interview.

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Also on one of his most infamous songs...

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To be more accurate AIDS is a collections of symptoms, all of which are 'natural'. It is the HIV virus which may or may not be natural. Personally, I believe that it was a mutated strain of SIV (s=simian) created in a lab in the late 40s / early 50s.
Fact: the first 'AIDS' case was in the 50's.
Fact: the oldest HIV containing tissue sample is also from the 50's.
Why would HIV have been created? A biological weapon maybe, but not particularly effective.
TT

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and I know, I think

Why?

BECAUSE THEY ARE DICKS.

Holy shit you're right! I'M CONVINCED!

I remember reading on another thread some people felt that because Frank spoke out against the powers that be and wanted to run and change things they poisoned him. Some people said it was the same with Bill Hicks. Probably complete nonsense.... probably.

I have a friend who professed to me at one time that he believed that all of the famous revolutionary musicians that died in the 60's/70's were killed by the government in an attempt to stop the social revolution.

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“The power of pop music to corrupt and putrify the minds of world youth are virtually limitless."

So I hear, the doctor who found hendrix dead said he had drowned in red wine, not on a lump of vomit, and that he could not account for the vast quantities of it in his lungs. But that was probably more to do with his agent trying to cash in on his life insurance rather than the USA govt.
Were there ever any politicians who liked rock n roll?
TT

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and I know, I think

I remember reading somewhere that either Obama or Clinton personally asked Robert Plant, Jimmy Page and John Paul Jones for a 2012 Led Zeppelin reunion (and was steadfastly turned down). Also there are countless articles on Obama's iPod...
http://www.billboard.com/articles/news/474413/obamas-ipod-from-jay-z-to-john-coltrane
And this one on Clinton's... he's got some pretty folk-y tastes.
http://articles.chicagotribune.com/2009-03-09/news/0903080289_1_ipod-simon-garfunkel-playlist

And of course we can't forget good ol' Al Gore! He claims to be a lifelong FZ fan.

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Oh No! I don't believe it...
You say that you think you know the meaning of love...

Now that everyone, including babies, have a camera on their person 24/7, I'll give it 5 years until some quality, up close and personal snaps of otherworldly space (or ocean) craft provide irrefutable evidence of THEM.

Just check YT...

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Its old hat, and I can't copy the link, but I just saw the JFK vid where the driver 'shoots' him in the head. It appears to be VERY convincing, until another video clearly shows the 'gun' to be a shiny forehead / scalp.
TT

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and I know, I think

Nah, I'm talking about something as exciting & frightening as the one that visited my childhood home...

How's this one for the rabbit hole:

http://feralhouse.com/chomsky-doesnt-care-day/

"What about MIT, the institution from which Chomsky derives his money and credibility? Well, John Deutch, the Director of the CIA in the ’90s, is an “institute Professor” at MIT, and also serves on the Board of Directors of the largest military-industrial corporations. CIA and MIT are inseparable it seems. CIA started the MIT Center for International Studies back in 1950. CIA does much of its recruiting on the MIT campus. Why is Noam Chomsky, normally critical of the CIA so comfortable in this CIA epicenter?

And why does Chomsky say the murder of JFK and the 9/11 disaster are trivial and non-conspiratorial?"

Hmm, 'JFK & UFO' (on the same link) seems like a good yarn. That Fred Crisman gets about.
TT

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and I know, I think

We had some more good conspiracy topics. One of them is
http://www.zappa.com/messageboard/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=24782
and its reply is:
http://www.zappa.com/messageboard/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=24787

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There Are NO FORESTS
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rz_vx6GNlgg


Not saying I believe this, but it is interesting. If you watch keep a VERY open mind and try not to let your beliefs about the "flat earth" crowd discourage you. This has little to do with "flat earth" and why I left it out of the title.