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 Post subject: Re: The Bad Joke Thread
PostPosted: Sun Sep 27, 2020 5:56 am 
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Location: Québec country (let me dream...)
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 Post subject: Re: The Bad Joke Thread
PostPosted: Mon Sep 28, 2020 5:35 am 
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^^^^^^ I saw one once about a company who used the first 6 letters of the last name, followed by the initial from the first and middle names. Mary Elizabeth Cummings wasn't happy.

cumminme@

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 Post subject: Re: The Bad Joke Thread
PostPosted: Mon Sep 28, 2020 7:24 pm 
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^ :mrgreen:

Everyone at John Lennon International Airport has been quarantined.

Imagine...all the people...


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 Post subject: Re: The Bad Joke Thread
PostPosted: Tue Sep 29, 2020 7:21 pm 
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 Post subject: Re: The Bad Joke Thread
PostPosted: Wed Sep 30, 2020 12:59 pm 
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Blonde: Doctor Doctor can you give me some contradictive pills?

Doctor: Sounds like you're ignorant

Blonde: Yes, that's right. Three months


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 Post subject: Re: The Bad Joke Thread
PostPosted: Wed Sep 30, 2020 5:25 pm 
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 Post subject: Re: The Bad Joke Thread
PostPosted: Thu Oct 01, 2020 6:35 am 
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 Post subject: Re: The Bad Joke Thread
PostPosted: Sat Oct 03, 2020 3:37 pm 
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A girl decides to get a Beach Boys tattoo because her boyfriend is a huge fan. So she goes to the tattoo parlor and asks how much will a tattoo of a verse from her boyfriend's favorite song will cost. The tattoo artist tells her a price, which is too much for her. She then asks how much a tattoo with the Beach Boys logo is. The guy tells her a price, and again she responds that she cannot afford it. Disappointed, she is about to leave when the tattoo artist tells her that he can tattoo a 'B' on each cheek that is in her price range. The girl agrees and gets the tattoo.

On their anniversary, the couple goes out to dinner and comes back. The girl tells her boyfriend that she knows how much he likes the Beach Boys and tells him that she got a tattoo for him. She pulls down her pants and bends over. The guy looks at it, and then asks "Who the fuck is Bob?"


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 Post subject: Re: The Bad Joke Thread
PostPosted: Thu Oct 08, 2020 4:56 pm 
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 Post subject: Re: The Bad Joke Thread
PostPosted: Thu Oct 08, 2020 5:55 pm 
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^^Pretty sure this guy copied all my answers from 9th grade physical science ^^ :mrgreen:

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 Post subject: Re: The Bad Joke Thread
PostPosted: Fri Oct 09, 2020 9:13 am 
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Location: >>==> Wellington, New Zealand.
Spooky Halloween Hospital Lore

According to the nurses there was a woman named Karen who died several years ago in the hospital.

In some secluded hallways in the middle of the night with the lights out, you can hear her ghost complain.

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 Post subject: Re: The Bad Joke Thread
PostPosted: Fri Oct 09, 2020 9:40 am 
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 Post subject: Re: The Bad Joke Thread
PostPosted: Sun Oct 11, 2020 1:23 am 
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Never trust an atom. They make up everything.


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 Post subject: Re: The Bad Joke Thread
PostPosted: Sun Oct 11, 2020 6:52 am 
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Melania Trump wrote:
Never trust an atom. They make up everything.

My wife has been rewatching Bones and I JUST saw an episode where they made this joke.
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 Post subject: Re: The Bad Joke Thread
PostPosted: Sun Oct 11, 2020 1:38 pm 
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Pregnancy Advice: "Should I have a baby after 35?" "No, 35 children is more than enough." "I'm two months pregnant; when will my baby move?" "With any luck, right after he finishes college." "What is the most common pregnancy craving?" "For men to be the ones who get pregnant." "What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?" "Childbirth. " "The more pregnant I get, the more often strangers smile at me. Why?" "Because you're fatter than they are." "My wife is five months pregnant and sometimes borderline irrational." "Do you have a question?" "My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right?" "Yes, in the same way you can call a tornado an air current." "When is the best time to get an epidural?" "Right after you find out you're pregnant." "Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?" "Not if the word 'alimony' means anything to you." "Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?" "Yes. Pregnancy." "Do I have to have a baby shower?" "Not if you change its diaper very quickly." "Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?" "When the kid is in college!"

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 Post subject: Re: The Bad Joke Thread
PostPosted: Sun Oct 11, 2020 6:45 pm 
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 Post subject: Re: The Bad Joke Thread
PostPosted: Fri Oct 16, 2020 8:38 am 
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Did you hear about the blonde who stayed up all night wondering where the sun went after it set? Finally, it dawned on her!

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 Post subject: Re: The Bad Joke Thread
PostPosted: Fri Oct 16, 2020 8:52 am 
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What do you call a brunette standing between two blondes?

. . . an interpreter. 8)


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 Post subject: Re: The Bad Joke Thread
PostPosted: Fri Oct 16, 2020 10:51 am 
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If you're a minor drinking at your fathers third wedding to your cousin.....

you might be a redneck

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 Post subject: Re: The Bad Joke Thread
PostPosted: Tue Oct 20, 2020 1:40 am 
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 Post subject: Re: The Bad Joke Thread
PostPosted: Tue Oct 20, 2020 3:13 am 
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