Zappa.com

arf arf

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Hey Punk, where you goin' with those two votes in your hand?

^^^^^ hahahahaaaa excellent! ^^^^^

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Hey Punk, where you goin' with those two votes in your hand?

_________________
Hey Punk, where you goin' with those two votes in your hand?

_________________
Hey Punk, where you goin' with those two votes in your hand?

_________________
Hey Punk, where you goin' with those two votes in your hand?

_________________
Hey Punk, where you goin' with those two votes in your hand?

_________________
Hey Punk, where you goin' with those two votes in your hand?

_________________
Hey Punk, where you goin' with those two votes in your hand?

Social Distancing Pickup Lines: "Is that hand sanitizer in your pocket or are you just glad to be within six feet of me?" "I saw you from across the bar. Stay there." "If Covid-19 doesn't take you out, may I?" "Hey babe, can I ship you a drink?" "The libraries are all closed; can I check you out instead?" "Hey, baby; do you come within six feet of here often?" "Is your name Coronavirus, 'cause you take my breath away!" "Want to have dinner? How's 2022 look for you?" "You're so hot, I'd jump in front of a sneeze for you!" "Hey, girl. I got 2-ply at my place!" "That's one sexy cough!" "Baby, do you need toilet paper, because I can be your Prince Charmin." "Wanna catch Covid the fun way?"

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Join the PackardGoose forum! Send me a PM!

_________________
Hey Punk, where you goin' with those two votes in your hand?

_________________
Hey Punk, where you goin' with those two votes in your hand?

_________________
Hey Punk, where you goin' with those two votes in your hand?

How does Moses make his tea?

Hebrews it... I'm serious! That Israeli how he does it!

People must not cough near you , they must cough far away .

If you hear someone coughing near you , tell them to....

...far cough .

It is with great sadness that I have to mention the loss of a few further local businesses around our Town. The bra manufacturer has gone bust, the specialist in submersibles has gone under, the manufacturer of food blenders has gone into liquidation, a dog kennel has had to call in the retrievers, the suppliers of paper for origami enthusiasts has folded, the Heinz factory has been canned as they couldn't ketchup with orders, the tarmac laying company has reached the end of the road, the bread company has run out of dough, the clock manufacturer has had to wind down and gone cuckoo, the Chinese has been taken away, the shoe shop has had to put his foot down and given his staff the boot and finally the laundrette has been taken to the cleaners!

What do you call a Muslim who owns 6 goats? – A pimp.

TAOISM: Shit happens.

BUDDIHISM:If shit happens, it isn't really shit.

ZEN: What is the sound of shit happening?
And, if shit falls in the woods, does it make a sound?

HINDUISM: This shit happened before.

ISLAM: If shit happens, it is the will of Allah.

ISLAM II: If shit happens, kill the person(s) responsible.

SHI'ITE ISLAM:Shit must happen to Salmon Rushdie

CONFUCIANISM: Confucius says "shit happens."

PROTESTANTISM: Let shit happen to someone else.

CATHOLICISM: If shit happens, you deserved it.

JUDAISM: Why does shit always happen to us?

BAHA'I: Shit happens to everyone equally.

KRISHNA: Shit happens, shit happens, happens, happens, shit, shit.

VEDANTA: Shit happening is an illusion.

MORMON: 10% of my shit belongs to God.

CELTIC FOLKLORE: At the end of every rainbow is a pot of shit.

EARLY EGYPTIAN: Shit happens, the world is a microcosm of the universe;
therefore, the universe is shit.

SCIENTOLOGY: Shit can happen to you too.

TRANSACTIONAL ANALYST: I acknowledge my shit, and it's ok.

ATHEISM: Shit happens, therefore, there is no God.

AGNOSTICISM: Shit may or may not happen.

CHRISTIAN SCIENCE: It's not shit, and it's not happening.

SOLOPSISM: If there is no shit, it doesn't happen.

EXISTENTIALISM: So shit happens.

DECONSTRUCTIONALISM: What makes you think that's shit?

OPTIMISM: That's the best damn shit that ever happened.

PESSIMISM: It's all shit.

SHAMANISM: Shit is a fertiliser.

POLLYANNA: Where there is shit, there is life.

RASTAFARIANISM: Let's smoke this shit.

SECULAR HUMANISM: Shit evolves.

FUNDAMENTALISM: Born-again shit.

NEW AGE: If shit happens, honour and share it.

ORAL ROBERTS: Send me money or shit will happen.

RICHARD NIXON: I am not shit.

RONALD REAGAN: I don't recall shit happening.

HEISENBERG: Shit may happen and it may not.

CLARENCE THOMAS: Shit happened to me once, but I express regret.

DECARTES:1. Shit happens, therefore I am.
2. I am, therefore shit happens.
3. Cogito ergo defecato.

AA: Deal with shit one day at a time.

Evidence that Covid-19 is a Female Plot: All sports are cancelled. All bars are closed. It kills mostly men. Males who live must stay home with their families.

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Join the PackardGoose forum! Send me a PM!

_________________
Hey Punk, where you goin' with those two votes in your hand?